07.08.09

Everyday Manners – Etiquette Tip #2

Posted in Etiquette tagged , , , , , , at 10:02 am by bellanica

DSC_0476I know that many Mavens of Manners preach the evils of technology, especially cell phones. Public cell phone usage is definitely a pet peeve of many. I personally have no major aversion to the use of cell phones in public, in theory. As with anything, though, there is a right way to use them and there is a way of using them that can be extremely annoying.

The number one problem that most people have with cell phone users is the volume at which people choose to talk. I have never understood the reasoning behind screaming into the cell phone, or any phone for the matter. The mere fact that when speaking into a phone, one’s mouth is directly next to the other person’s ear should be enough to make a person realize that there is no need to yell while talking. If you have to speak at such a loud volume, consider excusing yourself and moving away from others. Trust me, you will be doing those around you and yourself a big favor. Really do you think the people sitting around you in a public place really want to know the details of what you had removed from your groin or some other equally personal and gross procedure? Believe me, they don’t and honestly, do you really want strangers that far up in your personal business? Of course you don’t. Lower your voice, save the conversation for another time, or simply move away.

The volume of the cell phone ring can be a real problem. This is actually one of the things about cell phones that annoy me the most. There are some real cool ringtones out there, funny ones, and even some that are quite clever. But to have your cell phone set to the highest volume and ringing repeatedly in a crowded place that echoes, like Starbucks for instance, can be the most nerve grinding experience for those of us who have to hear it. If you have trouble hearing your phone, a good rule of thumb is to keep it near your body in a pocket or holder and activate the ring + vibrate feature. then you can have your volume set to a civilized level and you won’t miss any calls. This won’t work of course, if your phone is in the bottom of your purse or left in your car.

Another problem with cell phones is texting. A lot of people are really freaked out by texting. This is something that doesn’t really bother me, but I can see how it can drive others crazy. Here are a few good rules for texting.

1. Put the phone away or down during dinner. Not necessarily before or after dinner, but while the food is on the table. I really don’t know how one can text while eating anyway. You end up getting food all over your phone, and it makes it pretty difficult to actually enjoy the meal.

2. Texting while driving is just a no-no. It is extremely dangerous. This is not just a courtesy thing, it is a matter of life and death. Don’t do it!

3. Whenever there is a ceremony, event, church, meeting, etc. It is probably not a good idea to be finger dancing while your attention and respect should be elsewhere.

4. I have mixed feelings on texting during the movie. I know that we are asked not to do it before the movie starts. I am assuming the light from a person’s phone can be annoying. Of course, I think this is a bit extreme. The newer phones often have dimmer adjustments or the screen can just be covered with a hand or jacket. I personally feel that as long as the sound is muted and precautions are taken to keep from blinding others, there is really no problem with it.

Do text your teens at appropriate times. Teens these days are quite adept technologically. Yet parents are either reluctant or not knowledgeable enough to meet them where they are. Texting is great way to communicate with them on their level. Especially if you happen to be an overbearing parent. Take the opportunity to teach them the do’s and don’ts of cell phone usage, and before we know it, we will have a whole new generation of techies with class.

One thing to remember is that we all have to share the world and the sometimes tight enclosed spaces that we frequent. If something that you are doing offends someone or causes someone stress, why do it? Think about how people use cell phones around you and what bothers you and what doesn’t and then err on the side of caution. The last thing you want is for someone to go “mobile” on you, especially when you could simply just be civil and lower your voice.

Everyday manners can make life easier for everyone….everyday!!!

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